This day was horrible, haha. Just completely unplanned and chaotic; I forgot my homework, i was just barely on time; it was horribly chaotic. But whatever; So I guess I'll keep on going with info on my crush. haha. First; I'm gonna steal an idea from Tyler TGBH in giving friends alternative names to protect my and their identities, haha. So we'll call my Crush, let's see; Paul. We'll call him Paul, I like that name.
So I met Paul a few years back all the way in 6th grade in middle school. Back then I didn't really think much of him; I barely knew him, but he really started catching my eye Freshman year of high school; I noticed he was amazingly adorable; he's always been in my group of friends, but since then I've maneuvered myself to get closer to him; and now we're best friends.
Unfortunately; the way we both are kinda keeps our inner thoughts and desires secrets, even to each other. He's extremely shy, I'm extremely shy; and we don't really poke each other too much for information; but we're good friends. It's kinda odd the way our relationship works. He never talks about girls and neither do I; of course occasionally if a third person is like, "hey isn't she hot?" or something like that, I'll kinda mutter "sure" or something along those lines, but he won't say anything, he'll just kinda give a slight smile and look away or redirect the conversation, this happens whenever the subject of him and girls are brought up.
This gives me hope that he may not be straight, which, if he was would be fine, because it's what I expect, but there's not harm in hoping right? He never talks to girls, and really does prefer to hang around us guys. haha. He's an odd kid, but I love him; he's so cute and he's so playful and fun. Plus I know if I ever really needed him; he'd be there.
Together we honestly are honestly such nerds, haha. We are entertained by the stupidest stuff when we're together, I don't even know. haha. We both LOVE certain types of techno, even though it may be weird. I don't really know what I'm interested to be honest; I can really follow anything, except for sports, I don't like sports all too much, haha. As for him, Paul used to play basketball and actually used to be a gymnast when he was younger, both of which might explain why he isn't like 700lbs since he eats so much crap. haha. He's thin and cute, but he eats a ton. Plus his being a gymnast, I hope would make him great in bed if I ever got the opportunity ;) Other than that, I don't really know that he has any real interest; he kinda just goes with the flow.
As far as our futures, I wanted to go to Med School; but because of the recession, we don't have much money at this point; so the United States Military started looking a lot more appealing. I need to make a living somehow, the military will pay for my schooling and that's why I'm joining up. I'm not sure what branch yet, but I've been looking at the US Air Force, the US Coast Guard and the United States Marine Corps. Whichever I choose to join, Paul decided he'd join with me, he says he wants to protect me, haha. It's adorable; he wants to be with me I guess; I think it's cute, and I'm thankful that he's doing it.
I'm not sure that this will be my last post for the day, I kinda feel suddenly like there's a ton to write about, but again; I'm not sure where to start, but I'll stop here for now.
Slow Sunday *64
3 hours ago
He wants to protect you? That's really... not cute, but nice, promising, good to hear, heartwarming, something in this direction. Good luck with your blog and in general.
ReplyDeletehe GAY.... he gay dude -___- XD well i guess thats good for you :P prob shouldnt pass my judgment too quickly but hes GAY i just know it! :P
ReplyDeleteand im not sure that military thing is a good idea ..... buuuut its your life and decision i guess... so GOOD LUCK sean!!! :) <3 <3 <3
Yea I agree with Lunty-- I think he sounds gay too. At least I would be exactly as you are: keeping the "hes straight until proven otherwise" face strong for everyone else-- but deep down just hoping hes gay and into you.
ReplyDeleteWe've all been there, of course-- the crush on the straight friend :-) You know its funny just from reading, like Im expecting him to be gay-- because that would just work so well in the 'story of sean' that I get to read all the way across the country... but only 1/10ish people are gay...so youre smart to not get your hopes up.
I also know that I personally couldn't join the military. The good news is that you have some time right-- you are prob a soph right? So a couple years :-) I wouldn't make too many plans set in stone just yet.
So as a fellow lover of weird techno and other odd things-- what music are you talking about?
Now you tweeted (or at least I think it was you?) that you had told another friend or a bunch of friends about being gay/bi. Have you thought about telling him? I think you should consider it? In the best case, he is too and you live happily ever after and have like a million of his babies.... in the worst case, you get just a better friend, but at least don't have to keep guessing. If he's straight-- he's straight and there's nothing you can ever do to change that. So unless you really think there is a real possibility of losing a friend (which wouldn't be a real friend anyways) maybe you should think about it. I'm sure you already have :-)
You're cool sean I like your posts... and blog world is getting slower and slower so keep 'em coming!
Steve