I find people wonderfully interesting. Everyone has their own unique thoughts, opinions, and judgments. People are either all unique, or all the same. Maybe both; probably both. everyone is unique and similar at the same time. It only makes sense. We all look different, sound different; not a single one of us, has ever been exactly the same as someone else. At least not to my knowledge.
So my face really hurts right now, haha, I box, not like professionally, or as like a sport; but at least once a week usually, I go to the gym and box, haha. I think it's fun; it gets the adrenaline pumping and blood flowing. I never really took any lessons or anything, I just kinda go at it, haha, but it's worth it, keeps me in shape I guess, and it keeps me occupied for a while.
I have realized now, in talking to Tyler, how close I am to ending my youth, I have like a year to a year and a half before I go out and get a real, full time job, and join the military. I'll be on my own then; I'll live on my own, and I'll be fully accountable for my actions. I'll still be young and all; but to me, sixteen seems like the ripe teenage year. I love being 16, I hate the fact I'm gonna be like 30 one day. Nothings wrong with being 30, but it's like i won't be youthful, you know? I'll have so much more responsibility and stuff. Growing up can be pleasurable though too.
Too bad for Neverland
I don't have the ideal teenage life, haha, like drive a nice car and have a wonderful relationship; stuff like that, but I think growing up; I'll have my wonderful BMW or Mercedes Benz, and then have like a mansion, and have a wonderful man or woman as my partner, with an awesome cat and a dog. Cause I love both. A cat to sleep on my bed, and a dog to play with, haha. I love pups and kittens, haha so cute, as gay as that is, haha, they are both so playful, haha.
This post has been a jumble of thoughts and nonsense of mine, haha, but I guess that's how I write, haha, I don't know. Forgive me you guys, if sometimes I seem like I get too philosophical and stuff, haha. Sometimes I just do that, haha. Anyways, I'll finish up here for now. I kinda didn't have much to talk about Paul this post, so if you guys were looking for an update with him, things are still going great and stuff; no worries, haha. No significant new developments, haha
Slow Sunday *64
9 hours ago
lol-- I hate the fact that Im going to be like 30 one day too... its interesting- it actually feels very far from me, maybe as "far away" as it felt when I was 16 (which feels recent, strangely). Don't get me wrong- I have changed a lot since 16-- Im not an immature person...well depends I guess-- maybe in some aspects I am, but I act like an adult most of the time *stamps foot trying to convince myself of this*.
ReplyDeleteSo even though I am teetering ever so close to being 'late mid twenties' or 'early late twenties' (not sure which one I hate less)-- I still feel very youthful. I don't mean this in a purvy way-- Im trying to date high school kids...tho my last boyfriend was 21, which is younger than me... I mean I still feel "at the beginning" of my life. I am incredibly scared of losing that. I don't want to 'be complacent' in my life and give up hopes/dreams.
One thing I always think is interesting: when you're in high school everything feels like its in front of you. You have so much time to do 'this' or 'that' (school, relationships, etc.) but at some point you realize that you are passing milestones where you plainly dont have enough time to do it in the future. For example, I am having this debate with myself if I should continue on and go for the PhD in Dec. The youthful side of me would like to think I have time, so if not now-- then later. But I know that 'later' isn't coming-- if I don't go for it now, I probably can't ever. This definite "cant ever" is scary, and I think thats "growing up"-- realizing the finite-ness of our short lives. Also, death. Not to continue on this depressing rant-- but when you lose a parent-- or someone really close to you-- that's profound (at least it was in my case). It's something where words fail- you can't 'tell' someone-- they have to experience it. This is actually a big reason I feel very fraternal to Nic. He and I both lost our fathers way before we should've, and it brings a perspective to life that is absent otherwise.
Sorry Sean I really hate to keep sending you these philosophical and self-centered comments that are surely boring ;-) But eh, you post things that really resonate with me and I'm interested in...so sorry again. Ill try for a light, fun comment next time. something trite that probably mentions penis and dumb girls or lesbians :S
Steve
On a re-read I meant to say Im *not* trying to date high school kids... lol, nice irony that my mis-type occurs when im trying to claim that I am not purvy, which im not #fml
ReplyDelete@Planetx_123 yeah, i was wondering about that, haha. I wasn't sure if that's what you meant, haha.
ReplyDeleteomg i dont want to grow up either!!! :(
ReplyDelete